Tip #15

Be honest with your friends.

I learned recently that my best friend apparently "can't stand" my fiance and while I'm used to taking her brutal honesty with salt, the thing is, she wasn't honest.

My fiance accidentally read a text message from my best friend meant for another girl. To rub it in, she sent this message while hanging out and talking with my fiance.

For a girl who can tell me to my face that I look stupid or that I'm embarrassing her, I'm somewhat baffled and hurt by such a two-faced action. Why wouldn't she just talk to me about her issues with my fiance?

I've certainly done my best to be honest with her about my opinions on her romantic interests. I assumed I was receiving the same level of honesty in return and it's a little stunning that I wasn't.

While no one has the right to directly tell you who or who not to date, you should always be open to the opinions of friends and family. After all, those closest to you might have some good advice or a perspective that hadn't occurred to you.

It also brings you and your friend closer, as you get the chance to demonstrate to each other that your friendship will last through any romantic ventures (successful or failed).

Tip #5

Be friends.

What makes an awesome friend? Someone who listens, someone who tells you like it is, someone you can laugh with, someone you can cry with, someone you can do nothing with and still have a good time. Why base your relationship on a different set of criteria?

Friendship is the secret ingredient to any healthy, long-lasting relationship. Neither you nor your significant other is likely to finish the race with looks and sex drive fully intact, so a romantic relationship clearly needs to have stronger foundations than the physical part.

Thus, friendship. Even if your sex life falls off a cliff, if you can laugh with your honey, you'll get through it.

Standards

You could say I have pretty high standards. For my friends and especially for my lover.

I demand acute honesty and intend to return the favor in full. If you aren't going to be 100% honest about who you are and what you do with your significant other, then why even bother trying to make a long-term relationship work with them?

First and foremost, be honest with yourself about who you are. If you don't like something about yourself, change it or learn to like it. I find it impossible to respect people who do not respect or have confidence in themselves. If you don't love yourself, I'm certainly not going to go out of my way to.

I believe in self-sufficiency. Relationships don't complete anybody. If you fail to be a well-rounded individual on your own, you will NEVER find yourself in a healthy relationship. For any type of relationship to last and be fulfilling, two people have to work together. There is nothing more vexing than a friend who can't say no; it's a form of dishonesty. And so we come full circle, apparently.